I'd love to give the graduation commencement speech for the high school where I lead Young Life. It hasn't happened yet, but it's on my bucket list. When preparing, I'd take some pointers from Rhett & Link's Pokemon Pinata decapitation, but it might be even more helpful to listen to the commencement address King Solomon would've given.
Here's an excerpt below from The Gospel Coalition Blog and Joe Carter.
People often ask, "What's the key to success?" My father—who was quite a success himself—gave me some sound advice on the subject: "Be strong, and show yourself a man, and keep the charge of the Lord your God, walking in his ways and keeping his statutes, his commandments, his rules, and his testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses."
One of the most important things I know is this: Fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.
I knew a kid once who was poor but wise. He went from being in prison to become a king. Led a great number of people. But now no one remembers him—at least not fondly. He was better off being poor. What happened to him? Well, after he got in power he no longer knew how to take advice. The lesson: Listen to advice and accept instruction, so that you may gain wisdom in the future.
Young men, admire the beauty of your wife; young women, admire the beauty of your husband. (I recommend comparing a woman's hair to a flock of goats and a man's hair to a raven.)
I had a dream once that God would give me whatever I asked. If you ever have a similar dream, here's what I recommend: Don't ask God to give you wealth or a long life. Ask for anunderstanding mind and the ability to discern good from evil.
What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done. Sure, you may have iPhones and Starbucks now. But when it comes down to it, there is nothing really all that new.
Buy truth, and do not sell it. Buy wisdom, instruction, and understanding too.
Aim to get rich slowly. Wealth gained hastily will dwindle; wealth gained little by little increases.
Go out into the grass and find some ants. Watch what they do. Notice how even this insect works hard preparing for the future? You should do the same.
Don't ever say, "Why were the former days better than these?" Wise people never ask that question.
Even fools who keep their mouths shut seem wise. So if you want people to think you're intelligent, close your lips.
Remember when you were a kid and your dog died? That's going to happen to you too. Did your dog go to heaven? I don't know.
Don't take everything people say to heart. You know that many times you yourself have cursed others.
When you vow a vow to God, pay it as soon as you can. God takes no pleasure in fools, so pay what you vow.
Don't spend too much time drinking alcohol. It may go down smooth, but in the end, it'll bite you like a snake.
The more you know, the more the world breaks your heart.
Never trust a woman who would accept half a baby.