Wednesday, August 14, 2013

How To Be An Ineffective Young Life Leader

Originally posted July 2012.
  • Don't remember kids' names. 
  • Teach your Campaigner group spiritual disciplines you don't personally practice.
  • Always send mass text messages. Never call kids individually.
  • Depend on your own ability to win kids to Christ.
  • Retweet all tweets by your high school friends that could get them grounded if seen by their parents. 
  • Don't ask anyone to pray for you and the ministry of YL.
  • Be inconsistent in when you show up at the school and in your high school friends' lives.
  • Talk more than you listen. Especially focus on talking about yourself.
  • Don't get plugged into a local church body.
  • Only befriend popular kids.
  • Make lots of promises to kids, but don't keep them.
  • Be judgmental, always pointing out the faults of everyone but yourself.
  • Compare yourself with other YL leaders in your area.
  • Whenever talking with kids, never mention Christ. You wouldn't want to be too overbearing.
  • Be undisciplined and last minute in preparing all Club talks and Campaigner lessons.
  • Don't let anyone ever know your weaknesses.
  • Make fun of people, especially awkward high schoolers. It always gets a good laugh.
  • Spend lots of time with kids of the opposite sex. Purple is a pretty color.
  • At all costs avoid personally studying God's Word.
  • Never meet any parents. That's too intimidating.
  • Don't become friends with people on your YL team. Don't ever spend time with them outside of YL events.
  • Brag about all your accomplishments. Maybe even break out your high school letter jacket so the kids will know just how much of a stud you truly were.
  • Do whatever it takes to hide your secret sins. Only confess them to God, not anyone else.
  • Lie whenever necessary to protect your image.
  • Don't ever memorize scripture.
  • Always choose being cool over being wise, its more fun to be "one of the kids."
  • When in doubt, just do it anyways baby. YOLO!
  • Make kids clean up after club while you check your iPhone for ESPN scores and to find out who got eliminated on The Bachelor.
  • Keep 'Young Life' separate from the rest of your life. Don't invite kids into your family, home, or church.
  • Tell kids you'll be there and then show up really late or just don't show up at all.
  • Gossip about other kids and YL leaders.
  • Complain about how much you sacrifice to be a YL leader.
  • Draw people to yourself, not to Christ.
  • Don't ever pray for kids.
  • Always be sarcastic.

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